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Hey...Captain!
You go!
Hey!
You know George,
it all started back before the beginning of time.
When the windy wind blew through the trees,
and banged against the rocks,
creating a beat.
Natives, Indians, and Visitors
would long for that sound
until one day, George,
Lanny Toe Basqueemps Albano
picked up a big stick
and hit a dirt pocket.
Got it george?
The sound so moved Lanny Toe that he called that sound a beat, a drum.
Do you hear me George? A Drum!
And it sound like this.
Ah...music to my ears.
And the natives were chanting,
"Toya Toya Mingo Sono" (?)
"Toya Toya Mingo Sono"
which means "Turn Down Turn Down Me Want Solo".
And the neighbors were complaining because of the noise!
So right from the beginning, rock had a bad name.
The neighbors complained.
They moved.
The new neighbors complained.
It was almost like being on tour, George.
Till finally they moved to the beach.
And that was the first beach band
led by the great Captain Lou Kahuna(?) Albano.
So I started everything, George!
Some say that I'm not wrapped too tight,
Captain Lou, Captain Lou, Captain Lou.
But when I'm on the scene, everything's alright.
Captain Lou, Captain Lou, Albano
I'm the man of a thousand faces.
I know we'll be goin' places (Hey!)
I'm going to be your guiding light
Captain Lou, Captain Lou, Albano
Hey don't worry 'cuz it's figured in,
Captain Lou, Captain Lou, Captain Lou
And I got teeth like Rin Tin Tin
Captain Lou, Captain Lou, Albano
I'm the man of a thousand faces
I know we'll be goin' places (Hey!)
I'm going to be your guiding light
Captain Lou, Captain Lou, Albano
Captain Lou, Captain Lou, Albano
I'm the man of a thousand faces.
I know we'll be goin' places (Hey!)
I'm going to be your guiding light
Captain Lou, Captain Lou, Albano
Captain Lou, Captain Lou, Albano
Captain is happening baby
Play this record again brother play it over and over
This is the rock and wrestling connection
Captain Lou Albano took music and made it what it is today
What I did for wrestling, I can do for rock and roll
Took it from an A to a Minor C, and sharp (?)
Made it what it is
Now listen George
No George don't eat the microphone George no food
I'm the kingdom of rock and roll (?)
I'll be addressing 50 tag team champions (?)
[more undecipherable ranting]
I am impressed, the history of rock and roll with Captain Lou Albano what about you Vince?
Well that man can sing as well as eat.
I'll tell you what, it didn't sound to me like he was strumming the rubber bands, it sounded like he was chewing on 'em.
I'll tell you I was impressed, give me a break, Jesse.
Give you a break? Who could produce something like that?
Wait a minute I believe I've got it here on paper...Vince McMahon? Who is this?
Mona Flambé.
Mona Flamboyant produced that?
No, but speaking of flamboyant, that takes us to our next artist...
And it's gonna be, the heavyweight champion of the world, the group, the World Wrestling Federation All Stars, here it is: Hulk Hogan's Theme coming up.
Yeeeccch! Blech!
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